China Arts & Entertainment
The Battle between Tiger Mom and Cat Dad
China’s latest TV hit ‘Tiger Mom, Cat Dad’ has sparked online debates over the best parenting style. Is it better to be an iron-fisted tiger mom, or a relaxed cat dad?
The Chinese-American author Amy Chua and her best-selling book ” The Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother” (虎妈战歌, 2011), brought up the image of a strict Mom who pushed kids extremely hard to be the best at school. Although her iron-first parenting methods sparked controversy in the West, her book was well-received in China, as it made Chinese parents more assertive in their parenting.
But now the term “Cat Dad” (猫爸) has become trending on Sina Weibo due to the popular Chinese Tianjin TV drama “Tiger Mom, Cat Dad” (虎妈猫爸, 2015). The topic “The Battle between Tiger Mom and Cat Dad”(#虎妈猫爸大作战#) has been viewed over 25 million times and commented on more than 16 thousand times since the TV show was released in May.
“The right school is the ticket to success.”
In the TV hit ‘Tiger Mom, Cat Dad’, 7-year-old Qianqian (茜茜) is the daughter of strong-willed mother Bi Shengnan (毕胜男) and easy-going father Luo Su (罗素). She’s the little princess of the family. She is raised by her grandparents until Bi Shengnan realizes they have spoiled their daughter – other kids her age seem to have learned so many more things before officially entering school. She then becomes a typical hyper-disciplining ‘tiger mom’, aiming to help Qianqian catch up with her peers. However, her husband (the ‘cat dad’) does not seem to care too much about his daughter’s school scores, as long as she is happy.
Chinese parents like Bi Shengnan are well known for putting extreme pressure on their kids to do good in school. They make every effort to offer their kids the best education. To the majority of Chinese parents, the right school is the ticket to their kids’ promising future. Many of them have moved in order to get their children admitted to good schools. The term “School District Houses” (学区房) refers to those houses located within the range of primary or secondary schools. Children are ensured to be admitted to these schools after living there for a certain period of time. In the TV show “Tiger Mom, Cat Dad”, Bi Shengnan and the rest of the family pay more than double the price for an apartment in Beijing, so that Qianqian is eligible to enroll in a “key primary school” (重点小学) to get better education.
“I push my daughter now so she has more freedom in the future.”
Not satisfied with the level of education in their own district, Chinese parents are willing to pay high fees on an apartment so that they can send their children to the best schools possible. On Sina Weibo, a user named “Yoyo looks like Daddy” believes this is necessary, since a good school offers the right study environment and resources. “After all, the chances of kids becoming talented and successful without being pushed are very slim,” she says: “Parents don’t dare to take such a risk because we all only have one child in the family.” Stating that she is the mother of a four-year-old girl, ‘Yoyo’ stresses that it’s the parents’ responsibility to help children decide what is the best for them while they are young: “I push my daughter hard so that she can go to a good university in the future, and then gain more freedom to choose what she wants to do in the future. I want her to be able to choose meaningful jobs rather than being forced to do work she doesn’t enjoy at all. It’s all about the sense of achievement.”
Her statement also well explains the importance of academic achievements in Chinese society. Chinese students spend their entire youth working hard and preparing for the gaokao (高考), the college entrance exam, which is the only way to guarantee a bright future for most Chinese students. Therefore, Chinese parents push their child to achieve high scores. According to many parents, they are not trying to put excessive pressure on their children, but instead, are doing what is necessary to set their children up for a successful future.
User “Hanzi V” regrets that her parents were not hard enough on her when she was younger. She recalls: “My parents believed in happiness, and they thought it was my own responsibility to study hard. My mom used to ask me to learn a lot of things, but she gave up quickly after I lost interest. I’m not satisfied with my current state of life. Happy education only works for those kids who study consciously. I realized I was so naive and ignorant when I was a kid. How I wish my parent pushed me harder.”
“All my decisions are based on my mom’s wishes.”
However, a large number of users are inclined to “Cat Dad”, who prefer to give kids the right to choose whatever they think is the best for them. User “Spring” says: “I understand the parents’ cares and thoughts, but I do feel lost, as all the decisions I’ve made in my life so far are based on my mom’s wishes. I feel like I have lost the ability to know what I really want. Isn’t it a better idea to let the children obtain such an ability earlier? We all live once and life cannot be designed. Why do parents always expect their kids to realize the dreams they failed to fulfill?”
At the end of the TV show, daughter Qianqian gets depressed because the pressure and stress associated with school becomes too much to handle. It finally hits mother Bi Shengnan that a happy childhood is crucial to a child. “I’m not a tiger mom at all and my son is now doing his postdoctoral research on high polymer materials”, Weibo user “Fish is Flying” says: “I raised my son on my own, and he considers me as his friend. I don’t understand the intentions of these parents who put great pressure on their kids and themselves. The key is to teach the next generation how to behave and improve their learning methods. That’s all that really matters.”
By Yiying Fan
Follow @WhatsOnWeibo
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About the author: Yiying Fan is a Chinese freelance writer, follow her on Twitter @yiyingfan, or visit her blog at www.yiyingfan.com.[/box]
©2015 Whatsonweibo. All rights reserved. Do not reproduce our content without permission – you can contact us at info@whatsonweibo.com.
China Memes & Viral
When a Scene from a 2010 Chinese TV Drama Goes Viral: The ‘Cao Cao Flips Rice Bowl’ Meme
Cao Cao flipping the rice bowl is another Cao Cao meme that’s widely used to convey internal struggles about facing reality.
These days, a viral meme originating from the Chinese TV series Three Kingdoms (三国) has gained significant traction on Chinese social media.
In a memorable scene from the 2010 series, Cao Cao, a prominent warlord in Chinese history played by actor Chen Jianbin (陈建斌), angrily flips his rice bowl upon receiving news of a surprise attack, only to gather the spilled rice back into the bowl later.
This scene featuring an enraged Cao Cao has resurfaced and struck a chord with individuals reluctantly facing reality.
This short scene from the 2010 Chinese historical drama "Three Kingdoms" – in which Cao Cao angrily flips over his rice bowl on the table and then shortly after puts it all back in the bowl – has gained significant traction on Chinese social media recently. pic.twitter.com/DrM3Xgi35F
— What's on Weibo (@WhatsOnWeibo) June 3, 2023
Turning into a popular meme, Cao Cao flipping the rice bowl has become widely employed to convey sentiments of self-inflicted humiliation or the hesitation to undertake certain actions.
The Context of the Scene
The specific scene comes from episode 12 of the Three Kingdoms. Warlord Cao Cao, who is governor of Yan Province, is enjoying his meal when his advisor comes in to inform him about a surprise attack by Chinese military general Lü Bu (吕布), capturing almost the entire province.
The meme of “曹操盖饭.” The term “盖” is often translated as “covering” or “capping.” When combined with 饭 (rice), it forms a noun that refers to a dish where various toppings, such as cooked meat or sauces, cover the rice, similar to a Donburi-style meal.
Upon receiving this alarming report, Cao Cao’s anger flared, and he promptly flipped his rice bowl upside down on the table, an act now commonly referred to as “Cao Cao flips the rice bowl” (曹操盖饭).
Cao Cao’s anger was intertwined with disbelief at Lü Bu’s audacity to execute such a daring attack. Cao Cao’s advisor swiftly clarified that the mastermind behind the attack was Lü Bu’s strategist, Chen Gong (陈宫), who was also renowned as a brilliant strategist during the Three Kingdoms era.
As he grasped the true situation, Cao Cao gradually regained his composure and meticulously gathered the spilled rice back into his bowl – an act now known as “Cao Cao retrieving his bowl of rice” (曹操撤回了一碗饭),- before resuming his meal.
The catchphrase that is used to describe Cao Cao retrieving his rice utilizes the word “chèhuí” (撤回), which means “to recall” or “to retract.” It can be understood as “Cao Cao recalled his bowl of rice,” drawing a parallel to the recall function in WeChat that allows users to retract or cancel a message after it has been sent.
How To Use the Meme
The contrast between the forceful act of flipping the rice bowl and the subsequent unwillingness and silence displayed while putting the scattered rice back into the bowl is a key factor contributing to the meme’s viral nature on the internet.
Netizens have creatively applied Cao Cao’s meme in various situations to express their own internal struggles or a sense of self-inflicted humiliation they experience (自己打自己脸).
For instance, the meme effectively captures the feelings of both white-collar workers and students who utilize the “Cao Cao flips the rice bowl” meme on Fridays. On this day, they express their frustration with the demanding work week and their eagerness to leave their tasks behind.
On Friday it's f*ck this job… pic.twitter.com/S8cHTQOzgX
— What's on Weibo (@WhatsOnWeibo) June 3, 2023
However, the arrival of Monday brings a sense of reality as they realize the necessity of returning to the office or school. The “Cao Cao retrieves his bowl of rice” meme is then employed to represent the unavoidable resumption of their daily routines.
…on Monday, it's back to work… pic.twitter.com/ST1v8eqjyq
— What's on Weibo (@WhatsOnWeibo) June 3, 2023
Meme via Memebase / Cheezburger.
In this regard, the meme is somewhat comparable to the English “F*ck This Job, *Goes to Work*” meme (link).
“Not Possible, Absolutely Not Possible”
It is not the first time for Three Kingdom‘s Cao Cao to achieve viral status through memes.
Prior to the emergence of the ‘Cao Cao flips/retrieves the rice’ meme, Cao Cao was already well-known for another meme phrase: “Not possible, absolutely not possible” (“不可能，绝对不可能”).
This meme originated from a scene where Cao Cao received news of Liu Bei’s rebellion, immediately after confidently asserting that Liu Bei, another major warlord, would never betray him.
“Not possible, absolutely not possible”
The meme captures the essence of self-deception and the unwillingness to accept the truth. Similar to the current popular meme, this meme is often used to depict situations where someone unintentionally exposes their own flaws or contradicts their previous statements, symbolizing a self-inflicted “slap in the face.”
Read more of our articles about memes in China here.
By Zilan Qian
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China Celebs
Fandom Meets Matrimony: Sea of Brides at Roy Wang’s Concert as Female Fans Show Up in Wedding Gowns
After showing up as brides at Roy Wang’s concert, some female fans attempted to return their gowns within the store’s 7-day ‘No Questions Asked Return Policy’.
A recent concert by Chinese celebrity Roy Wang (Wang Yuan 王源) has become a hot topic on Chinese social media as female fans attending the show collectively decided to wear wedding dresses to express their love for the singer.
Born in 2000, Roy Wang is best known as a member of the hugely popular TFboys idol group that debuted in 2013, but his solo career has also been thriving for years. Wang is an award-winning musician, who is now among China’s most influential young celebrities. On Weibo, he has nearly 85 million followers.
The sight of so many fans coming to Wang’s Chongqing concert wearing wedding dresses was already remarkable, but it garnered even greater attention when it turned out that some of the women’s boyfriends were so upset over their girlfriends wearing a wedding dress for another man that they ended the relationship because of it.
On Douyin (China’s TikTok), the related discussion made it to the top 5 trending daily topics list.
Female fans partying in their wedding dress. Photo posted on Weibo.
The story gained further traction when reports emerged that some female fans who had recently purchased wedding dresses for the concert attempted to return them to the store the next day, taking advantage of the store’s policy that allows returns within seven days without requiring a specific reason (7天无理由退货).
“I already wondered why business was suddenly booming,” one Chongqing wedding gown seller wrote on social media, complaining how the return policy was being abused by some of Roy Wang’s fans.
Others saw the fact that they wore the wedding dress to the concert as a unique selling point, and tried to resell their gowns online for more than the original price, claiming that the dress still had “a hint of the concert’s aroma.”
Scene of the concert.
Commenters bombarded these women with negative comments, as the topic also drew wider discussions on how far some fans are willing to go to show their love for their idols.
Some social media users expressed that a wedding dress has a symbolical or even sacred function, and that tying the concept of fandom to matrimony is inappropriate. They condemned the women for showing up to the concert as brides.
Given that many of the commenters criticizing the women were male, there were also feminist voices that condemned these men for their pettiness and chauvinistic attitudes. One comment stood out: “There will always be men whose ego is bruised when women they don’t even know won’t wear a wedding dress and save their chastity for them. Thanks to Roy Wang’s concert, I once again realize the diversity of species.”
In an online poll asking people “Can women only wear a wedding dress once in their lives” (#女生一生只能穿一次婚纱吗#) the majority of people replied that they should just wear whatever they like.
“My first thought is that this is romantic,” one popular entertainment blogging account (@娱大蜀黍) wrote: “My second thought is that it’s actually quite moving. In the midst of their youth, they are writing a passionate chapter for themselves. They will treasure it as a beautiful memory later on in life. They do what they love and they’re not bothering anyone. It’s perfectly fine.”
By Manya Koetse & Miranda Barnes
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