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The Battle between Tiger Mom and Cat Dad

China’s latest TV hit ‘Tiger Mom, Cat Dad’ has sparked online debates over the best parenting style. Is it better to be an iron-fisted tiger mom, or a relaxed cat dad?

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China’s latest TV hit ‘Tiger Mom, Cat Dad’ has sparked online debates over the best parenting style. Is it better to be an iron-fisted tiger mom, or a relaxed cat dad?

The Chinese-American author Amy Chua and her best-selling book ”  The Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother” (虎妈战歌, 2011), brought up the image of a strict Mom who pushed kids extremely hard to be the best at school. Although her iron-first parenting methods sparked controversy in the West, her book was well-received in China, as it made Chinese parents more assertive in their parenting.

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But now the term “Cat Dad” (猫爸) has become trending on Sina Weibo due to the popular Chinese Tianjin TV drama “Tiger Mom, Cat Dad” (虎妈猫爸, 2015). The topic “The Battle between Tiger Mom and Cat Dad”(#虎妈猫爸大作战#) has been viewed over 25 million times and commented on more than 16 thousand times since the TV show was released in May.

 

“The right school is the ticket to success.”

 

In the TV hit ‘Tiger Mom, Cat Dad’, 7-year-old Qianqian (茜茜) is the daughter of strong-willed mother Bi Shengnan (毕胜男) and easy-going father Luo Su (罗素). She’s the little princess of the family. She is raised by her grandparents until Bi Shengnan realizes they have spoiled their daughter – other kids her age seem to have learned so many more things before officially entering school. She then becomes a typical hyper-disciplining ‘tiger mom’, aiming to help Qianqian catch up with her peers. However, her husband (the ‘cat dad’) does not seem to care too much about his daughter’s school scores, as long as she is happy.

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Chinese parents like Bi Shengnan are well known for putting extreme pressure on their kids to do good in school. They make every effort to offer their kids the best education. To the majority of Chinese parents, the right school is the ticket to their kids’ promising future. Many of them have moved in order to get their children admitted to good schools. The term “School District Houses” (学区房) refers to those houses located within the range of primary or secondary schools. Children are ensured to be admitted to these schools after living there for a certain period of time. In the TV show “Tiger Mom, Cat Dad”, Bi Shengnan and the rest of the family pay more than double the price for an apartment in Beijing, so that Qianqian is eligible to enroll in a “key primary school” (重点小学) to get better education.

 

“I push my daughter now so she has more freedom in the future.”

 

Not satisfied with the level of education in their own district, Chinese parents are willing to pay high fees on an apartment so that they can send their children to the best schools possible. On Sina Weibo, a user named “Yoyo looks like Daddy” believes this is necessary, since a good school offers the right study environment and resources. “After all, the chances of kids becoming talented and successful without being pushed are very slim,” she says: “Parents don’t dare to take such a risk because we all only have one child in the family.” Stating that she is the mother of a four-year-old girl, ‘Yoyo’ stresses that it’s the parents’ responsibility to help children decide what is the best for them while they are young: “I push my daughter hard so that she can go to a good university in the future, and then gain more freedom to choose what she wants to do in the future. I want her to be able to choose meaningful jobs rather than being forced to do work she doesn’t enjoy at all. It’s all about the sense of achievement.”

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Her statement also well explains the importance of academic achievements in Chinese society. Chinese students spend their entire youth working hard and preparing for the gaokao (高考), the college entrance exam, which is the only way to guarantee a bright future for most Chinese students. Therefore, Chinese parents push their child to achieve high scores. According to many parents, they are not trying to put excessive pressure on their children, but instead, are doing what is necessary to set their children up for a successful future.

User “Hanzi V” regrets that her parents were not hard enough on her when she was younger. She recalls: “My parents believed in happiness, and they thought it was my own responsibility to study hard. My mom used to ask me to learn a lot of things, but she gave up quickly after I lost interest. I’m not satisfied with my current state of life. Happy education only works for those kids who study consciously. I realized I was so naive and ignorant when I was a kid. How I wish my parent pushed me harder.”

 

“All my decisions are based on my mom’s wishes.”

 

However, a large number of users are inclined to “Cat Dad”, who prefer to give kids the right to choose whatever they think is the best for them. User “Spring” says: “I understand the parents’ cares and thoughts, but I do feel lost, as all the decisions I’ve made in my life so far are based on my mom’s wishes. I feel like I have lost the ability to know what I really want. Isn’t it a better idea to let the children obtain such an ability earlier? We all live once and life cannot be designed. Why do parents always expect their kids to realize the dreams they failed to fulfill?”

At the end of the TV show, daughter Qianqian gets depressed because the pressure and stress associated with school becomes too much to handle. It finally hits mother Bi Shengnan that a happy childhood is crucial to a child. “I’m not a tiger mom at all and my son is now doing his postdoctoral research on high polymer materials”, Weibo user “Fish is Flying” says: “I raised my son on my own, and he considers me as his friend. I don’t understand the intentions of these parents who put great pressure on their kids and themselves. The key is to teach the next generation how to behave and improve their learning methods. That’s all that really matters.”

By Yiying Fan

 

[box type=”bio”] yiying2About the author: Yiying Fan is a Chinese freelance writer, follow her on Twitter @yiyingfan, or visit her blog at www.yiyingfan.com.[/box]

©2015 Whatsonweibo. All rights reserved. Do not reproduce our content without permission – you can contact us at info@whatsonweibo.com.

About the author: Yiying Fan is a world traveler and Chinese freelance writer from Shanghai.

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China ACG Culture

“Black Myth: Wukong”: From Gaming Screens to the CMG Spring Festival Gala?

Manya Koetse

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FROM THE WEIBO WATCH PREMIUM NEWSLETTER

Is Chinese game sensation ‘Black Myth Wukong’ making a jump from gaming screens to the CMG Spring Festival Gala? There’s already some online excitement over a potential performance at the biggest liveshow of the year.

The countdown to the most-watched show of the year has begun. On January 29, the Year of the Snake will be celebrated across China, and as always, the CMG Spring Festival Gala, broadcast on CCTV1, will air on the night leading up to midnight on January 28.

Rehearsals for the show began last week, sparking rumors and discussions about the must-watch performances this year. Soon, the hashtag “Black Myth: Wukong – From New Year’s Gala to Spring Festival Gala” (#黑神话悟空从跨晚到春晚#) became a topic of discussion on Weibo, following rumors that the Gala will feature a performance based on the hugely popular game Black Myth: Wukong.

Three weeks ago, a 16-minute-long Black Myth: Wukong performance already was a major highlight of Bilibili’s 2024 New Year’s Gala (B站跨年晚会). The show featured stunning visuals from the game, anime-inspired elements, special effects, spectacular stage design, and live song-and-dance performances. It was such a hit that many viewers said it brought them to tears. You can watch that show on YouTube here.

While it’s unlikely that the entire 16-minute performance will be included in the Spring Festival Gala (it’s a long 4-hour show but maintains a very fast pace), it seems highly possible that a highlight segment of the performance could make its way to the show.

Recently, Black Myth: Wukong was crowned 2024’s Game of the Year at the Steam Awards. The game is nothing short of a sensation. Officially released on August 20, 2024, it topped the international gaming platform Steam’s “Most Played” list within hours of its launch. Developed by Game Science, a studio founded by former Tencent employees, Black Myth: Wukong draws inspiration from the classic Chinese novel Journey to the West. This legendary tale of heroes and demons follows the supernatural monkey Sun Wukong as he accompanies the Tang Dynasty monk Xuanzang on a pilgrimage to India to retrieve Buddhist scriptures. The game, however, focuses on Sun Wukong’s story after this iconic journey.

The success of Black Myth: Wukong cannot be overstated—I’ve also not seen a Chinese video game be this hugely popular on social media over the past decade. Beyond being a blockbuster game it is now widely regarded as an impactful Chinese pop cultural export that showcases Chinese culture, history, and traditions. Its massive success has made anything associated with it go viral—for example, a merchandise collaboration with Luckin Coffee sold out instantly.

If Black Myth: Wukong does indeed become part of the Spring Festival Gala, it will likely be one of the most talked-about and celebrated segments of the show. If it does not come on, which we would be a shame, we can still see a Black Myth performance at the pre-recorded Fujian Spring Festival Gala, which will air on January 29.

Lastly, if you’re not into video games and not that interested in watching the show, I still highly recommend that you check out the game’s music. You can find it on Spotify (link to album). It will also give you a sense of the unique beauty of Black Myth: Wukong that you might appreciate—I certainly do.

By Manya Koetse

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Chinese Movies

Why Chinese Hit Movie “Her Story” is ‘Good Stuff’: Stirring Controversy and Celebrating Female Perspectives

China’s end-of-year movie hit, Her Story, is sparking debates and highlighting the rising influence of Chinese female directors.

Wendy Huang

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The Chinese comedy-drama Her Story (好东西, literally “Good Stuff”), directed by Shao Yihui (邵艺辉), has been gaining attention and sparking discussions on Weibo since its late November release in mainland China.

The film features an all-star cast including Song Jia (宋佳), Zhong Chuxi (钟楚曦), Zeng Mumei (曾慕梅), Zhao Youting (赵又廷), and Zhang Yu (章宇). It tells a quirky yet heartfelt story about two women: Wang Tiemei (王铁梅), a self-reliant single mom juggling life and work, and Xiao Ye (小叶), a free-spirited young woman navigating her chaotic relationships.

Their friendship begins when Xiao Ye starts babysitting Tiemei’s nine-year-old daughter, Wang Moli (王茉莉). Xiao Ye introduces her drummer friend, Xiao Ma (小马), to teach Moli how to play the drums, but Xiao Ma’s presence stirs jealousy in Tiemei’s unemployed ex-husband, who schemes to regain his place in the family. Blending humor with poignant insights, the film explores themes of imperfect love, friendship, and the messy process of rebuilding lives.

(“Her Story” poster and the director Shao Yihui)

The film also addresses a range of hot societal issues through dialogues woven into everyday interactions, touching on topics like menstruation stigma, sexual consent, feminism, and how family dynamics can impact personal development.

In just eight days, Her Story surpassed 300 million RMB ($41 million) at the Chinese box office (#好东西票房破3亿#). Two days later, on December 2, it exceeded 400 million RMB (#好东西票房破4亿#), and on December 7 news came out that it had surpassed the 500 million RMB ($68.7 million) mark at the box office.

The film also achieved an impressive 9.1/10 rating on Douban, a Chinese platform similar to IMDb, making it the highest-rated domestic film on Douban in 2024.

(“Her Story” on Douban)

Notably, 65.4% of voters awarded it five stars, while only 0.5% gave it one star.

 
Conflicting Views: From Feminist Film to Chick Flick
 

Despite its huge success, it is almost unavoidable for a movie this big to come without controversy. The film sparked debate on Hupu (虎扑), a platform focused on sports and men’s lifestyle, where it received a lower score of 5/10. While 33.1% of users gave it five stars, 58.4% rated it one star, reflecting divided opinions.

(“Her Story” on Hupu)

Much of the criticism comes from male viewers who feel the film undermines men by portraying them in non-traditional ways and omitting proper names for male characters, such as referring to the ex-husband only as “the ex-husband” (前夫). On the other hand, many female viewers resonate with the film’s female-centered perspective, with one scene blending household sounds and Xiao Ye’s recordings praised as a standout cinematic moment of 2024.

Interestingly, not all women appreciated the film either. A Weibo user, identified as a female scriptwriter for two Chinese TV dramas, emphasized that most of the producers of the film are male. She accused the director of hypocrisy, claiming Shao accepts money and resources from privileged men to create films that encourage female audiences to look down on average men.

She wrote, “I hope that everyone who believes in the ‘ghg’ [girl help girl] myth and supports female idols will also congratulate the male producers who will earn a lot of money from the film.”

Zhou Liming (周黎明), one of China’s most influential film critics, noted two extreme perspectives in film reviews. Some critics label the film as a “boxer film” (拳师电影) or an “extreme feminist film.”

However, the film itself suggests otherwise, as reflected in Moli’s line, “I don’t want to box,” when her father tries to convince her to take up boxing. Some audiences interpreted the line as rejecting extreme feminist messages.

In China, the term “boxer” (拳师) is used to critique certain feminists. The second character in the word for feminists (“权” [quán] in 女权主义者) is pronounced the same as the first character in “boxer” (“拳” [quán] in 拳师). This term often mocks behaviors seen as overly aggressive or lacking nuance in feminist discourse, such as avoiding dialogue or oversimplifying social issues.

Some also dismissed the film as a “chick flick,” a casual term for romantic comedies, which Zhou argued unfairly minimizes its significance. He likened the film to Woody Allen’s Annie Hall, suggesting that, much like Allen’s work, Her Story transcends gender differences and reflects the cultural zeitgeist of its time.

Despite the controversy, the film has been praised by notable figures like actor Zhang Ruoyun (张若昀), who called it “super good, super awesome, and super cute” (“超级好、超级牛、超级可爱的东西”). Zhang described the movie as tackling absurd yet realistic issues from a female perspective with humor and depth.

 
The Increasing Influence of Female Directors in China
 

At the end of Her Story, Tiemei’s daughter, Moli, nervously prepares for her first drum performance. Despite her hesitation, she gathers her courage and steps on stage. This moment reminded some viewers of a similar scene in another female-directed film this year, YOLO (麻辣滚烫), where the protagonist gears up for a boxing match.

YOLO is a 2024 comedy-drama directed by Jia Ling (贾玲), starring Jia Ling and Lei Jiayin (雷佳音). A comedic adaptation of the Japanese film 100 Yen Love (2014), it tells the story of Du Leying (杜乐莹), a woman facing personal struggles who turns to boxing after meeting coach Hao Kun (昊坤). Through her journey, she finds a new direction in life after their breakup. Grossing USD 496 million worldwide, YOLO became the highest-grossing Chinese film of 2024.

These parallels between Her Story and YOLO highlight a broader trend: the growing prominence of female directors in Chinese cinema. Beyond the discussions of plot and central themes, Her Story reflects the increasing success and influence of women filmmakers in the industry.

In 2024, female directors have made a notable impact on Chinese cinema, with their films achieving both critical acclaim and box office success. Their works also spark conversations about the need for more diverse perspectives in the industry.

(“The Last Frenzy” poster and the director Wu Rina)

The Last Frenzy (末路狂花钱), directed by Wu Rina (乌日娜), premiered on May 1. This comedy follows Jia Youwei (贾有为), a man diagnosed with a terminal illness, who decides to sell his assets and live fully with his friends. Despite mixed reviews and a Douban score of 5.9, the film grossed over 700 million RMB ($96 million) by May 31, becoming a major box office hit.

(“Stand By Me” poster and the director Yin Ruoxin)

Stand By Me (野孩子, literally “Wild Kids”), directed by Yin Ruoxin (殷若昕), premiered on September 13. Starring Wang Junkai (王俊凯), it tells the story of two neglected children, Ma Liang (马亮) and Xuan Xuan (轩轩), who form a makeshift family while facing life’s challenges. With a Douban rating of 6.7, the film grossed 241 million RMB by October 9.

(“Like A Rolling Stone” poster and the director Yin Lichuan)

Like A Rolling Stone (出走的决心, literally “The Determination to Leave”), directed by Yin Lichuan (尹丽川), premiered the same week as Stand By Me. Inspired by Su Min (苏敏), a 50-year-old woman who embarked on a solo road trip, the film explores themes of self-discovery and the struggles of neglected women. Featuring Yong Mei (咏梅), the film earned praise for its authenticity, achieving a Douban score of 8.8 and grossing over 123 million RMB.

To the Wonder (我的阿勒泰, literally “My Altay”), a film-like TV drama directed by Teng Congcong (滕丛丛), adapts Li Juan’s (李娟) memoir. Starring Ma Yili (马伊琍), it tells the story of Li Wenxiu (李文秀), a young woman finding her place in her hometown of Altay after setbacks in the big city. Known for its poetic storytelling and portrayal of ethnic harmony, the series has a Douban score of 8.9 from over 300,000 ratings, ranking among the top dramas of 2024.

 
“An Era Where Women Are Being Seen”
 

The growing influence of female directors has sparked discussions about how women’s perspectives are challenging traditional storytelling.

Some Weibo users compared a scene from Her Story, where Tiemei scolds a man for urinating roadside, to a similar moments in YOLO. In YOLO, Hao Kun’s attempt to urinate roadside is humorously interrupted by car headlights. Such scenes highlight how female directors reinterpret everyday behaviors, inviting audiences to question societal norms.

Her Story has already been released in several countries, including the United States, Australia, Germany, and the United Kingdom, with more international releases to follow.

The success of Her Story, the conversations it inspires, and its contribution to highlighting female perspectives in film reflect the evolving dynamics of contemporary cinema and the strengthening of female voices in traditionally male-dominated industries.

On Weibo, many view this as a positive development. One commenter wrote:

Her Story [好东西/”Good Stuff”] is truly ‘good stuff.’ (..) At the start of this year, I watched YOLO, and at the end of this year, I watched Her Story. Suddenly, I feel very grateful to live in this era—the era where women are gradually being ‘seen.’ Both films hold very special meaning for me. It feels like everything has come together perfectly. I hope to see more outstanding works from female directors in the future, and I look forward to an era where there’s no gender opposition, only mutual equality.”

By Wendy Huang

Edited for clarity by Manya Koetse

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©2024 Whatsonweibo. All rights reserved. Do not reproduce our content without permission – you can contact us at info@whatsonweibo.com

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