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Not Good Enough: Spring Festival Dinner Break-Up Goes Viral

One Shanghai girl was so disappointed about what her boyfriend’s parents served her for Chinese New Year, that she ended her relationship because of it.

Manya Koetse

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One Shanghai girl was so disappointed about what her boyfriend’s parents served her for Chinese New Year, that she ended her relationship because of it. The story has gone viral on Chinese social media, reinforcing the ‘demanding leftover woman’ media cliché.

As first exposed on the Weibo page of online network   KDSlife, one Shanghai girl broke up with her boyfriend after seeing what his parents put on the table for Chinese New Year. The 26-year-old woman, who says to work in HR in a foreign company, joined her boyfriend to celebrate Spring Festival in his hometown in China’s southeastern province Jiangxi.

On a Chinese online community message board (liba.com) she posted:

“I want to break up – I am a pure Shanghainese, born in 1988, I look normal, and work in a foreign company’s HR department. My dad is retired after working at a state-owned enterprise, my mum is a teacher and will retire in two years. Our living standard is pretty good. I’ve been seeing this guy for a year, and he’s not from Shanghai. He’s a good worker and I like his looks, but since his family’s not well off, he won’t be able to buy a house for the coming years. My parents really disliked me going out with someone from another place, especially because he’s quite poor – that’s what my mum said. After all, parents only want the best for their own daughter. I’m also a bit shaken over this, especially since I joined my boyfriend for Chinese New Year this year after he had asked me over and over to come with him. If I wouldn’t have gone, I wouldn’t have known, but now that I went I was really shocked. This is what was first put on the table for us to eat when we arrived today…”

This is a screenshot of her post and the picture of the dinner she posted:
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According to an update by the woman that was also published on the KDS Weibo account, she indeed broke up with her boyfriend after dinner and immediately planned to go back to Shanghai. As she could not get a ticket straight away, she had to wait until the next morning before she could take the train.

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The post has caused quite some consternation on various Chinese social media sites, where thousands of netizens collectively share their opinion on the matter. Some threads on the issue, like the one on the KDS Weibo page, have attracted up to 97000 comments.

One netizen has changed the colors in the picture, making the food look better than in the picture posted by the girl:

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“There is fish and there is meat, your mother-in-law must have really done her best for this,” one netizen comments. “What a bitch,” another netizen says: “You don’t need your parents to fall in love with a guy. And that you immediately break up over his family’s living conditions is deplorable.”

In the same row of comments, one Weibo user says: “This looks like a good way to receive your guests for the countryside. Show those people some respect.” Another netizen wonders: “How can you work in HR when your EQ is so low?”

Amongst the many comments on this viral story, most netizens seem to agree that it is better when the families of a couple are well-matched (门当户对), but that you should always show respect to your partner and their parents. Virtually all netizens say that the girl has low moral standards for leaving her boyfriend after their first family dinner, and feel bad for him and his parents, who worked hard to put a Chinese New Year meal on the table.

The ‘leftover women’ of China have been a hot topic in the media for years. Young women, mostly from urban areas with a good job and high education and still unmarried at 26 are often labeled ‘leftover women’. They are often portrayed as demanding and materialistic in Chinese media.

“I don’t know if you noticed, but there are all wooden chopsticks on the table,” one Weibo user comments: “The only steel ones are those in her bowl, because they wanted her to have the best ones. Argh, I really cannot stand this!”

“Actually, I can understand this girl,” another person says: “But it is too impolite to leave before the New Year celebrations are over. They treat you as an honored guest, and you don’t even show them a bit of respect.”

By Manya Koetse

©2016 Whatsonweibo. All rights reserved. Do not reproduce our content without permission – you can contact us at info@whatsonweibo.com.

Manya Koetse is the founder and editor-in-chief of whatsonweibo.com. She is a writer, public speaker, and researcher (Sinologist, MPhil) on social trends, digital developments, and new media in an ever-changing China, with a focus on Chinese society, pop culture, and gender issues. She shares her love for hotpot on hotpotambassador.com. Contact at manya@whatsonweibo.com, or follow on Twitter.

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Avatar

    Tuno

    February 10, 2016 at 11:36 am

    Thank goodness my loving wife has never made such demands.

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China Food & Drinks

What’s Cooking? This Is What Putin and Xi Had for Dinner in Moscow

This was on the menu during the big dinner on Xi’s first night in Moscow during the state visit to Russia.

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WEIBO SHORT | Weibo Shorts are short articles on trending topics

While the state visit of Xi Jinping to Russia is in full swing, a smaller hashtag dedicated to the Xi-Putin meeting on Weibo is about what was served during the big dinner on Xi’s first night in Moscow (#两国元首今晚吃什么#).

The hashtag was hosted by RT (Russia Today), the Russian state media outlet which also has an account on Weibo (@今日俄罗斯RT) with over 1,7 million followers.

The account has been posting a lot about the “Putin Xi Meeting” (普习会) over the past few days.

The menu was as follows:

◼︎ Far Eastern Seafood appetizer (远东海鲜开胃菜)

◼︎ Blini with Quail & Mushrooms (鹌鹑和蘑菇煎饼)

◼︎ Sturgeon Fish Soup with Pirog (鲟鱼汤配皮罗格馅饼)
Clear soup with sturgeon is a Russian traditional dish; pirog is a popular Russian pie and in this case filled with meat rather than something sweet.

◼︎ Pomegranate Sorbet (石榴冰露)
Frozen sorbet, generally made using lime and mint.

◼︎ Pechora Nelma Fish with Vegetables (伯朝拉河鲑鱼配蔬菜)
Siberian white salmon from the Pechora River with vegetables.

◼︎ Venison served with Cherry Sauce

◼︎ Pavlova Dessert
Dessert made of meringue, whipped cream, and berries.

◼︎ “East Slope” and “West Slope” wine
Russian news agency TASS reported that two 2020 wines from Russia’s Divnomorskoye Estate winery were selected for the dinner.

On Weibo, the most popular comments were from those who said they wanted to see pictures of the dishes served.

Others wondered why vodka was not on the menu.

For more articles on China-Russian relations and related Weibo discussions, check our archives here.

 

Get the story behind the hashtag. Subscribe to What’s on Weibo here to receive our newsletter and get access to our latest articles. Follow us on Twitter here.

 

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©2023 Whatsonweibo. All rights reserved. Do not reproduce our content without permission – you can contact us at info@whatsonweibo.com.

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China Brands & Marketing

Haidilao No Longer Allows Customers to Bring Their Own Food

While Haidilao is banning its bring-your-own-food option, customers can still bring their own drinks.

Manya Koetse

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It was listed as one of the most popular topics on Weibo on Thursday, February 23: Chinese hotpot chain Haidilao bans customers from bringing their own food (#海底捞禁止自带菜#).

Starting from Feb. 21, 2023, the popular hotpot restaurant strictly enforces its policy of not allowing guests to bring outside food.

Previously, some Haidilao locations did allow customers to bring small amounts of their own food or ingredients, as long as they would sign a waiver. Haidilao stated that the recent ban on bringing in own food is in line with the restaurant’s food management and safety policies.

Haidilao has hundreds of restaurants across China, and people often line up to get a table. Dining at Haidilao is known to be an experience in itself, as the hospitality of Haidilao staff is widely praised; staff members are thoroughly trained to give customers the best possible service. Throughout the years, the chain has introduced many new concepts to enhance customer experience.

Haidilao is all about hotpot, where you put fresh ingredients in a big pot filled with simmering broth. The pot is placed in the middle of the table, accompanied by plates of various meats, vegetables, noodles, condiments, dipping sauces, etc. The ingredients are to be cooked in the broth – Haidilao offers many different options from spicy to mild -and then taken out and dipped into the chosen sauce before eating. Because of this dining style, it would be relatively easy for people to bring their own ingredients as they could just cook them at the table.

Although most commenters on Weibo think it is only reasonable for Haidilao to prohibit people from bringing in their own food, there are still many discussions about the topic. On Thursday night, the topic had over 260 million views on Weibo. By Friday, the hashtag had over 420 million clicks.

The most recurring comments are from those people who did not know that it was previously allowed to bring some of your own food. They wonder why people would do that in the first place. “If you go out for hotpot and bring your own food, why would you not just have hotpot at home?”

Haidilao’s ‘bring your own food’ option was reportedly introduced in 2017 as part of the restaurant’s ‘customer always comes first’ marketing concept, allowing people to bring an ingredient or dish they especially liked to the restaurant.

Some people say they appreciated the option. One commenter posted a photo showing how they brought their own seafood to Haidilao, writing: “Bringing your own food can be so delicious (..), we did it and we still ordered from the restaurant. They made us sign a waiver.”

Another Weibo user (@王铜根) wrote: “I’ve been going to Haidilao for many years and only this year did I bring my own food on two occasions. Once, I bought a very nice beef at the supermarket but I was afraid it was going to thaw on my way home and then I realized I could bring my own food to Haidilao and I went and ate it there. While I was eating it, I thought, Haidilao is so amazing, I vowed that I’d always support them.”

Over a year ago, Haidilao announced that it was closing about 300 of its restaurants which had been doing worse than expected.

Haidilao suffered because of Covid and local lockdowns. Due to the restaurant’s increased labor costs, its menu prices went up, much to the dismay of many netizens, who already thought the prices at Haidilao were steep before the pandemic. In October of 2021, the story of a Haidilao customer in Zhengzhou discovering that the 200 grams of tripe he ordered for 72rmb ($11) was actually only 138 grams also went viral on Weibo, stirring discussions on the Haidilao menu prices.

While Haidilao’s choice to ban its bring-your-own-food option could be a strategic business choice, it also could have other motives related to marketing and legal reasons. (Also read our story on this scammer pretending to find coackroaces in his hotpot to get money from Haidilao.)

Haidilao still allows customers to bring their own beverages to the restaurant.

Read more about Haidilao.

By Manya Koetse 

Featured image via weibo @咚咚东_ddd

 

Get the story behind the hashtag. Subscribe to What’s on Weibo here to receive our newsletter and get access to our latest articles:

Spotted a mistake or want to add something? Please let us know in comments below or email us. First-time commenters, please be patient – we will have to manually approve your comment before it appears.

©2023 Whatsonweibo. All rights reserved. Do not reproduce our content without permission – you can contact us at info@whatsonweibo.com.

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