China Brands, Marketing & Consumers

The Shengnu Dilemma: (Don’t) Marry Before You’re 30

Do (not) get married before you’re 30? It is an issue many netizens are concerned about.

Published

8 years ago

May 5, 2016

A new video by skincare brand SK-II on the topic of the marriage pressure faced by China’s single women has become popular on Sina Weibo. With best-selling books like ‘Don Not Marry Before You’re 30’ (30岁前别结婚) and ‘You Should Marry Before You’re 30’ (30岁前要结婚) hitting the Chinese market, the dilemma of China’s ‘leftover women’ consistently is a hot topic in China’s current popular culture.

In the follow-up to the Marriage Market Takeover video that made international headlines, skincare brand SK-II recently released a new video about finding “Mr. Right”, featuring Chinese-American author Joy Chen.

The previous SK-II video showed the dilemma of single Chinese women whose parents tell them it’s high time to “fix the problem” of being unmarried. Should they follow the traditional ideas about marriage their parents have (“you get matched, you get married”), or choose their own path (“I want real love” and “I feel free and enjoy the single status”)? In the ad, the women express that they do not want to marry for the sake of marrying, even if it makes them feel guilty and selfish towards their family.

dilemma

In SK-II’s most recent video, that is also part of the brand’s Change Destiny (#改写命运#) campaign, Joy Chen talks about the pressure Chinese women are facing to get married and advises them to become their own ‘Ms. Right’ before searching for ‘Mr. Right’. Within a week of its release, it had over two million views and was shared over 2000 times on Sina Weibo.

Don’t Marry Before You’re 30

Joy Chen (陈愉) is the Chinese-American author of the book Do not Marry Before You’re 30 (30岁前别结婚), which was published in 2012.

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The book became a best-seller in China, where especially women are pressured to get married before the age of 30 – a recent survey pointed out that 50% of Chinese men think a woman is already ‘leftover’ when she is not married by the age of 25. The marriage pressure facing Chinese women worsened due to China’s unbalanced male-female ratio since the 1980s, where China has a surplus of men of marriageable age.

The All-China Women’s Federation issued a report in late 2015 that showed that over 90% of married women in China tie the knot before the age of 30 and that the average Chinese gets married at 26. It was the same All-China Women’s Federation that first defined the term shèngnǚ 剩女 a.k.a. ‘leftover woman’ in 2007 as single women older than 27, later broadening to include unmarried women over the age of 25 (Fincher 2014, 16).

In Do Not Marry Before You’re 30, Chen talks about her own experiences as a ‘leftover woman’. Despite her two graduate degrees and successful career (i.e. she became Deputy Mayor of Los Angeles at 31), her parents still stressed the importance of becoming a good wife and mother. But this is exactly where the problem lies, according to Chen; a myriad of Chinese young women are well-educated, hard-working, and full of talent, but are being held back by their families and society at large by the time they graduate and get their first jobs. “Why is an entire generation of otherwise outstanding young Chinese women faltering at the very moment when they should be taking flight?” Chen asks.

The answer lies in the ‘leftover women’ stigma that is permeated in Chinese society and, consciously or unconsciously, ingrained in women’s minds. Chen goes against the grain and argues that for women to be successful in life and love, they should first focus on gaining experience – both work-wise and romantically – before settling down. Since people are still developing throughout their 20s, it is better to postpone marriage until you are ready to find the right person and make it work.

You Should Marry Before You’re 30

There are many books on the Chinese market that propagate a very different message. One of them is by author Xu Li (徐黎), who wrote a self-help book titled You Should Marry Before You’re 30 (30岁前要结婚) in 2013.

marrybefore

The book is a self-proclaimed “roadmap to happiness”. In this book, Xu says that China’s single women often flaunt their frivolous single lifestyle, but as they get older, they grow more anxious about their single status, which eventually will not make them happy. Xu’s message to women is not to wait with finding a partner until they are desperate, but to settle down while they are still carefree and relaxed about it.

Xu says that well-educated women all make the same mistake: “They think the more educated they are, the more charming they will be. But they do not know that a woman’s charm is not determined by her education record” (5). She also writes that women should “wake up”, as “nobody will only love you for your ambitions – you have to give them a reason to love you” (216).

At the same time, Xu propagates women to be independent within their marriage: “Ladies, if you want both financial support and emotional consideration from a relationship, then make sure you also make money, struggle and work. Love is not about being dependent, it is about strengthening each other’s independence and then make the effort to make it work together” (217).

The book’s main message is to settle down before 30 since it is easier for women to find a partner when they are in their twenties, and because it gives a couple the time to grow into a marriage together. As she says: “Some say that marriage is the end of love, but it is just the beginning.”

Becoming Ms. Right

In the latest SK-II video, the author of Do Not Marry Before You’re 30 talks about the right path to love. “In our society, our mothers urge us to marry early,” she says: “But our goal should not be marriage, it should be love. We first have to understand ourselves and grab this opportunity to become Miss Right, after which we can find a Mister Right that really suits us.” Chen tells she started dating at 18, did not get married until 38, and had her children at age 39 and 41.

joychen

Chen says that this is the first time in Chinese history that women have so many options when it comes to marriage and career. One’s twenties and thirties should be about making choices and finding one’s way, Chen says, and about realizing your own dreams.

“Not marrying is also an option”

The video and overall ‘Change Destiny’ campaign has received much support from Chinese netizens, who, in great numbers, share their views on the issue.

Many female Weibo netizens have been inspired by the campaign and post pictures of themselves with a written statement to choose their own destiny and to not let society or family put pressure on them to marry for the sake of marriage.

statement

There are also those who stress the commercial aspect of the video: “SK-II, we have to buy, buy, buy!” Others say: “This brand does really understand its target audience.”

Some netizens write that with all this focus on marrying and finding Mr. Right, one would almost forget that not marrying is also an option: “One should just live a wonderful life, which doesn’t necessarily include marriage,” one netizen comments. Another user says: “If my career goes well, I might choose not to get married.”

– By Manya Koetse
Follow @WhatsOnWeibo

References

-Chen, Joy. 2012. 30岁前别结婚 [Do Not Marry Before You’re 30]. Beijing: 中信出版社
-Fincher, Leta Hong. 2014. Leftover Women: The Resurgence of Gender Inequality in China. London: Zedbooks.
-Xu Li (徐黎). 2013. 30岁前要结婚 [You Should Marry Before You’re 30]. Beijing: 商务印书馆国际有限公司.

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Manya Koetse

Manya Koetse is the founder and editor-in-chief of whatsonweibo.com. She is a writer, public speaker, and researcher (Sinologist, MPhil) on social trends, digital developments, and new media in an ever-changing China, with a focus on Chinese society, pop culture, and gender issues. She shares her love for hotpot on hotpotambassador.com. Contact at manya@whatsonweibo.com, or follow on Twitter.

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China Brands, Marketing & Consumers

Zara Dress Goes Viral in China for Resemblance to Haidilao Apron

Who’s gonna buy this Zara dress in China? “I’m afraid that someone will say I stole the apron from Haidilao.”

Published

23 hours ago

April 19, 2024

Manya Koetse

A short dress sold by Zara has gone viral in China for looking like the aprons used by the popular Chinese hotpot chain Haidilao.

“I really thought it was a Zara x Haidialo collab,” some customers commented. Others also agree that the first thing they thought about when seeing the Zara dress was the Haidilao apron.

The “original” vs the Zara dress.

The dress has become a popular topic on Xiaohongshu and other social media, where some images show the dress with the Haidilao logo photoshopped on it to emphasize the similarity.

One post on Xiaohongshu discussing the dress, with the caption “Curious about the inspiration behind Zara’s design,” garnered over 28,000 replies.

Haidilao, with its numerous restaurants across China, is renowned for its hospitality and exceptional customer service. Anyone who has ever dined at their restaurants is familiar with the Haidilao apron provided to diners for protecting their clothes from food or oil stains while enjoying hotpot.

These aprons are meant for use during the meal and should be returned to the staff afterward, rather than taken home.

The Haidilao apron.

However, many people who have dined at Haidilao may have encountered the following scenario: after indulging in drinks and hotpot, they realize they are still wearing a Haidilao apron upon leaving the restaurant. Consequently, many hotpot enthusiasts may have an ‘accidental’ Haidilao apron tucked away at home somewhere.

This only adds to the humor of the latest Zara dress looking like the apron. The similarity between the Zara dress and the Haidilao apron is actually so striking, that some people are afraid to be accused of being a thief if they would wear it.

One Weibo commenter wrote: “The most confusing item of this season from Zara has come out. It’s like a Zara x Haidilao collaboration apron… This… I can’t wear it: I’m afraid that someone will say I stole the apron from Haidilao.”

Funnily enough, the Haidilao apron similarity seems to have set off a trend of girls trying on the Zara dress and posting photos of themselves wearing it.

It’s doubtful that they’re actually purchasing the dress. Although some commenters say the dress is not bad, most people associate it too closely with the Haidilao brand: it just makes them hungry for hotpot.

By Manya Koetse

Follow @whatsonweibo

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China Brands, Marketing & Consumers

More than Malatang: Tianshui’s Recipe for Success

Zibo had its BBQ moment. Now, it’s Tianshui’s turn to shine with its special take on malatang. Tourism marketing in China will never be the same again.

Published

3 weeks ago

April 1, 2024

Manya Koetse

Since the early post-pandemic days, Chinese cities have stepped up their game to attract more tourists. The dynamics of Chinese social media make it possible for smaller, lesser-known destinations to gain overnight fame as a ‘celebrity city.’ Now, it’s Tianshui’s turn to shine.

During this Qingming Festival holiday, there is one Chinese city that will definitely welcome more visitors than usual. Tianshui, the second largest city in Gansu Province, has emerged as the latest travel hotspot among domestic tourists following its recent surge in popularity online.

Situated approximately halfway along the Lanzhou-Xi’an rail line, this ancient city wasn’t previously a top destination for tourists. Most travelers would typically pass through the industrial city to see the Maiji Shan Grottoes, the fourth largest Buddhist cave complex in China, renowned for its famous rock carvings along the Silk Road.

But now, there is another reason to visit Tianshui: malatang.

Gansu-Style Malatang

Málàtàng (麻辣烫), which literally means ‘numb spicy hot,’ is a popular Chinese street food dish featuring a diverse array of ingredients cooked in a soup base infused with Sichuan pepper and dried chili pepper. There are multiple ways to enjoy malatang.

When dining at smaller street stalls, it’s common to find a selection of skewered foods—ranging from meats to quail eggs and vegetables—simmering in a large vat of flavorful spicy broth. This communal dining experience is affordable and convenient for solo diners or smaller groups seeking a hotpot-style meal.

In malatang restaurants, patrons can usually choose from a selection of self-serve skewered ingredients. You have them weighed, pay, and then have it prepared and served in a bowl with a preferred soup base, often with the option to choose the level of spiciness, from super hot to mild.

Although malatang originated in Sichuan, it is now common all over China. What makes Tianshui malatang stand out is its “Gansu-style” take, with a special focus on hand-pulled noodles, potato, and spicy oil.

An important ingredient for the soup base is the somewhat sweet and fragrant Gangu chili, produced in Tianshui’s Gangu County, known as “the hometown of peppers.”

Another ingredient is Maiji peppercorns (used in the sauce), and there are more locally produced ingredients, such as the black fungi from Qingshui County.

One restaurant that made Tianshui’s malatang particularly famous is Haiying Malatang (海英麻辣烫) in the city’s Qinzhou District. On February 13, the tiny restaurant, which has been around for three decades, welcomed an online influencer (@一杯梁白开) who posted about her visit.

The vlogger was so enthusiastic about her taste of “Gansu-style malatang,” that she urged her followers to try it out. It was the start of something much bigger than she could have imagined.

Replicating Zibo

Tianshui isn’t the first city to capture the spotlight on Chinese social media. Cities such as Zibo and Harbin have previously surged in popularity, becoming overnight sensations on platforms like Weibo, Xiaohongshu, and Douyin.

This phenomenon of Chinese cities transforming into hot travel destinations due to social media frenzy became particularly noteworthy in early 2023.

During the Covid years, various factors sparked a friendly competition among Chinese cities, each competing to attract the most visitors and to promote their city in the best way possible.

The Covid pandemic had diverse impacts on the Chinese domestic tourism industry. On one hand, domestic tourism flourished due to the pandemic, as Chinese travelers opted for destinations closer to home amid travel restrictions. On the other hand, the zero-Covid policy, with its lockdowns and the absence of foreign visitors, posed significant challenges to the tourism sector.

Following the abolition of the zero-Covid policy, tourism and marketing departments across China swung into action to revitalize their local economy. China’s social media platforms became battlegrounds to capture the attention of Chinese netizens. Local government officials dressed up in traditional outfits and created original videos to convince tourists to visit their hometowns.

Zibo was the first city to become an absolute social media sensation in the post-Covid era. The old industrial and mining city was not exactly known as a trendy tourist destination, but saw its hotel bookings going up 800% in 2023 compared to pre-Covid year 2019. Among others factors contributing to its success, the city’s online marketing campaign and how it turned its local BBQ culture into a unique selling point were both critical.

Zibo crowds, image via 163.com.

Since 2023, multiple cities have tried to replicate the success of Zibo. Although not all have achieved similar results, Harbin has done very well by becoming a meme-worthy tourist attraction earlier in 2024, emphasizing its snow spectacle and friendly local culture.

By promoting its distinctive take on malatang, Tianshui has emerged as the next city to captivate online audiences, leading to a surge in visitor numbers.

Like with Zibo and Harbin, one particular important strategy used by these tourist offices is to swiftly respond to content created by travel bloggers or food vloggers about their cities, boosting the online attention and immediately seizing the opportunity to turn online success into offline visits.

A Timeline

What does it take to become a Chinese ‘celebrity city’? Since late February and early March of this year, various Douyin accounts started posting about Tianshui and its malatang.

They initially were the main reason driving tourists to the city to try out malatang, but they were not the only reason – city marketing and state media coverage also played a role in how the success of Tianshui played out.

Here’s a timeline of how its (online) frenzy unfolded:

July 25, 2023: First video on Douyin about Tianshui’s malatang, after which 45 more videos by various accounts followed in the following six months.
Feb 5, 2024: Douyin account ‘Chuanshuo Zhong de Bozi’ (传说中的波仔) posts a video about malatang streetfood in Gansu
Feb 13, 2024: Douyin account ‘Yibei Liangbaikai’ (一杯梁白开) posts a video suggesting the “nationwide popularization of Gansu-style malatang.” This video is an important breakthrough moment in the success of Tianshui as a malatang city.
Feb – March ~, 2024: The Tianshui Culture & Tourism Bureau is visiting sites, conducting research, and organizing meetings with different departments to establish the “Tianshui city + malatang” brand (文旅+天水麻辣烫”品牌) as the city’s new “business card.”
March 11, 2024: Tianshui city launches a dedicated ‘spicy and hot’ bus line to cater to visitors who want to quickly reach the city’s renowned malatang spots.
March 13-14, 2024: China’s Baidu search engine witnesses exponential growth in online searches for Tianshui malatang.
March 14-15, 2024: The boss of Tianshui’s popular Haiying restaurant goes viral after videos show him overwhelmed and worried he can’t keep up. His facial expression becomes a meme, with netizens dubbing it the “can’t keep up-expression” (“烫不完表情”).

The worried and stressed expression of this malatang diner boss went viral overnight.

March 17, 2024: Chinese media report about free ‘Tianshui malatang’ wifi being offered to visitors as a special service while they’re standing in line at malatang restaurants.
March 18, 2024: Tianshui opens its first ‘Malatang Street’ where about 40 stalls sell malatang.
March 18, 2024: Chinese local media report that one Tianshui hair salon (Tony) has changed its shop into a malatang shop overnight, showing just how big the hype has become.
March 21, 2024: A dedicated ‘Tianshui malatang’ train started riding from Lanzhou West Station to Tianshui (#天水麻辣烫专列开行#).
March 21, 2024: Chinese actor Jia Nailiang (贾乃亮) makes a video about having Tianshui malatang, further adding to its online success.
March 30, 2024: A rare occurrence: as the main attraction near Tianshui, the Maiji Mountain Scenic Area announces that they’ve reached the maximum number of visitors and don’t have the capacity to welcome any more visitors, suspending all ticket sales for the day.
April 1, 2024: Chinese presenter Zhang Dada was spotted making malatang in a local Tianshui restaurant, drawing in even more crowds.

A New Moment to Shine

Fame attracts criticism, and that also holds true for China’s ‘celebrity cities.’

Some argue that Tianshui’s malatang is overrated, considering the richness of Gansu cuisine, which offers much more than just malatang alone.

When Zibo reached hype status, it also faced scrutiny, with some commenters suggesting that the popularity of Zibo BBQ was a symptom of a society that’s all about consumerism and “empty social spectacle.”

There is a lot to say about the downsides of suddenly becoming a ‘celebrity city’ and the superficiality and fleetingness that comes with these kinds of trends. But for many locals, it is seen as an important moment as they see their businesses and cities thrive.

Even after the hype fades, local businesses can maintain their success by branding themselves as previously viral restaurants. When I visited Zibo a few months after its initial buzz, many once-popular spots marketed themselves as ‘wanghong’ (网红) or viral celebrity restaurants.

For the city itself, being in the spotlight holds its own value in the long run. Even after the hype has peaked and subsided, the gained national recognition ensures that these “trendy” places will continue to attract visitors in the future.

According to data from Ctrip, Tianshui experienced a 40% increase in tourism spending since March (specifically from March 1st to March 16th). State media reports claim that the city saw 2.3 million visitors in the first three weeks of March, with total tourism revenue reaching nearly 1.4 billion yuan ($193.7 million).

There are more ripple effects of Tianshui’s success: Maiji Shan Grottoes are witnessing a surge in visitors, and local e-commerce companies are experiencing a spike in orders from outside the city. Even when they’re not in Tianshui, people still want a piece of Tianshui.

By now, it’s clear that tourism marketing in China will never be the same again. Zibo, Harbin, and Tianshui exemplify a new era of destination hype, requiring a unique selling point, social media success, strong city marketing, and a friendly and fair business culture at the grassroots level.

While Zibo’s success was largely organic, Harbin’s was more orchestrated, and Tianshui learned from both. Now, other potential ‘celebrity’ cities are preparing to go viral, learning from the successes and failures of their predecessors to shine when their time comes.

By Manya Koetse

Follow @whatsonweibo