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Defying Spinster Stereotypes: Why Chinese Unmarried Women are Rooting for Actress Faye Yu
Chinese actress Faye Yu has become a social media hit because of her views on love and marriage.
With contributions from Miranda Barnes.
Chinese actress Yu Feihong (俞飞鸿, born 1971), also known as Faye Yu, has recently become a big topic of discussion on Chinese social media for her refreshing perspective on marriage and singlehood.
The 47-year-old unmarried celebrity was previously on various Chinese talk shows hosted by older (male) presenters, who questioned the actress about her single status. These shows include ‘Behind the Headlines‘ (锵锵三人行) and and ‘Thirteen Invitations’ (十三邀), hosted by Xu Zhiyuan (许知远).
Faye Yu
Yu became a social media hit when popular writer Shen Jiake (@沈嘉柯), on June 20, posted images and quotes of her on the talkshow ‘Behind the Headlines,’ which was hosted by two men Dou Wentao and guest Feng Tang.
The various quotes show how Yu, in a relaxed and matter-of-fact way, addresses questions about her being unmarried, expressing that she does not need a partner to fulfill her needs, and that she did not feel she wants or needs to adapt her life to existing social expectations on the right age to get married.
Within a time frame of three days, the post has been reposted on Weibo over 120,000 times, receiving more than 100,000 likes. Other posts dedicated to Yu’s appearance on the shows have also attracted hundreds of comments and reposts.
Faye Yu became a social media hit after Shen Jiake posted these images of her appearance in a talk show.
Some of these screenshots include the following:
Presenter Dou Wentao: “Why have you already been single for so long?”
Faye answers: “I don’t think it’s a problem. For me whether to be single or married is not a difficult choice. Whatever stage I find more comfortable, is the stage I’ll choose to be in.“
Author Shen Jiake says about Yu: “Yu Feihong (俞飞鸿) really mirrors [these] old men’s own demons*, making a fool of their own reflections. Xu Zhiyuan, Feng Tang, and Dou Wentao all have to face their defeat.”
“I am rooting for Yu Feihong, she expresses my feelings!”
Over the past few days, thousands of people on Weibo comment on Yu’s attitude and previous interviews. Many of them are young and female.
In recent years, much has been written and discussed on the pressures Chinese women are facing today when it comes to marriage, and their risk of being stigmatized as a ‘spinsters’, ‘leftover women‘ or ‘shengnu‘ when they are older than 25 and still single.
In 2016, an SK-II skincare ad campaign titled ‘She Finally Goes to the Marriage Corner’ became a huge trending topic on Chinese social media. The ad video focused on Chinese single women, pressured to get married by their families and society, who pluck up the courage to speak out towards their parents against the burdens they face.
The SK-II video about China’s ‘leftover women’ that became a hit in 2016.
The online hype around Faye Yu shows similarities with the SK-II topic, and reveals that for many women in China today the pressure to get married is very real.
Chinese media outlets have also started to report on the Faye Yu hype, headlining: “Why are young people suddenly such fans of the 47-year-old Yu Feihong?” The trend is especially noteworthy because the talkshow appearances that have gone viral were recorded a time ago; ‘Behind the Headlines’ is a show that has already been canceled since 2017.
“Why have young people suddenly become such fans of Yu Feihong?”
“There is no age one should get married, there’s just an age one feels they should get married” (“没有该结婚的年龄，只有该结婚的感情), Weibo blogger Yan Wangye (@颜王爷) writes.
“I am rooting for Yu Feihong, she expresses my feelings!”, a typical comment says. “She’s just cool. Beautiful and cool,” others say.
But there are also many men responding to the topic. Famous designer ‘Teacher Kevin’ (@Kevin凯文老师) says: “I really appreciate Yu Feihong’s attitude on marriage: marriage is not a woman’s necessity. To be married or to be single is a personal choice, completely depending on what makes you more comfortable.”
“I have my own concept of marriage.”
Yu Feihong has been in the Chinese showbusiness since she was a child and has starred in dozens of movies since. Outside of China, she is mostly known for her role in the Joy Luck Club (1993). Many of these movies are about romance, and her own love life has been a topic of interest for Chinese journalists for years, especially because Yu is known as China’s “most beautiful woman above the age of 40.”
Faye Yu has worn a wedding dress in many of her movies, but not in real life.
In a 2016 interview with Phoenix News, Yu says: “By the time I was 20 years old, I was instilled with the concept of marriage by society and my family. But up to the present day, I will not simply accept a concept given to me by others. I have my own concept of marriage.”
In the interview, she says she has a stable partner, but does not feel the roles of “wife” or “mother” suit her lifestyle: “I don’t reject it, but I don’t feel it is something I need to attain in this life.”
“She says it so well,” one Weibo commenter writes: “I am a proponent of singlehood, although I do not oppose to marriage. I just feel we shouldn’t enter marriage within such a restricted time frame. This is a state of mind that is not welcomed or accepted by the majority of people.”
“I am not married for the mere reason that I do not want to be married yet,” another person says. “It is just so fascinating to see someone with such an independent way of thinking,” others say.
Besides praising Yu’s courage, there are also many who condemn Chinese men such as the talk show hosts Dou Wentao or Feng Tang who do not hesitate to question unmarried women such as Yu about their single status – even suggesting that being single and “being lonely” are practically the same thing.
Feng Tang about being single: “But you won’t finish a bottle of wine alone, and if you order food, two dishes might be too much but one dish is never enough. Aren’t you bothered by these kinda things?” Faye responds: “I really don’t have any problems with that.”
Many call these male presenters’ questioning a sign of ‘male chauvinism’ or, literally: ‘straight man’s cancer’ (直男癌). “I applaud Faye Yu’s patience to deal with these kinds of boring questions,” some say.
Faye Yu: “Listening to you guys talking, there’s one thing I don’t get – why, from a man’s point of view, is marrying something you seem to do out of some sort of charity for women?”
“I just really like Yu’s view on life,” another netizen writes: “Whether you’re single or married, the most important thing is to be your own independent person.”
Want to read more? Check out “The Shengnu Dilemma: (Don’t) Marry Before You’re 30.”
By Manya Koetse
Follow @whatsonweibo
Contributions from Miranda Barnes
* The term he literally used is ‘照妖镜’ (“老男人的照妖镜”), which means a “magic mirror for revealing goblins.”
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China Society
Death of Chinese Female Motorcycle Influencer ‘Shigao ProMax’ Sparks Debate on Risky Rides for Online Attention
After the tragic death of young motorcyclist ‘Shigao ProMax,’ netizens criticize influencers for reckless riding in pursuit of followers and likes.
A Chinese female motorcyclist from Suzhou, known as “Shigao ProMax” (@石膏ProMax) on Douyin, tragically passed away this week following a motorcycle crash in Suzhou’s Wujiang District.
The incident occurred in the late afternoon of September 29, when the 19-year-old Shigao, whose real name was Yang Huizi (杨惠子), was a passenger on the motorcycle, with her (male) friend driving the vehicle.
As the motorcycle collided with a car emerging from a side intersection, Yang was thrown off the back, propelled several meters through the air before landing on the road. Although she was reportedly wearing a helmet, it cracked during the crash, and she sustained a severe head injury.
A video circulating on social media shows the aftermath of the accident, with the motorcycle driver lying on the road and Yang Huizi a few meters away, initially attempting to crawl before collapsing (warning for graphic content). Despite rescue efforts, she later died in the hospital. The current condition of Yang’s friend, the rider, remains unclear.
Screenshot of the scene of the accident.
Yang had nearly 80,000 fans on Douyin, where she posted her first video in December 2019. By September 2024, she had shared a total of 1,298 videos.
On Weibo, many commenters voiced concern over how the news was headlined, criticizing the emphasis on her gender in the hashtag. The hashtag “Famous Female Rider Shi Gao Dies in Traffic Accident” (#网红女骑士石膏发生车祸身亡#) garnered over 170 million views on Weibo on Tuesday. Many commenters felt the headline made it seem as if the young woman had crashed the motor herself, while she was merely a passenger.
Others, however, see this trending news as an opportunity to highlight the risky behavior of motorcyclists, who not only endanger their own lives by speeding but also jeopardize the safety of others by showing off in traffic and driving recklessly.
Especially female influencers/motorcyclists are criticized for careless driving while flaunting their looks for social media posts.
Over the past years, the death of multiple motorcycle influencers have made Chinese headlines. In 2022, a popular Douyin influencer and motorcyclist known as “Xiaoyu Loves Eating Fish” (@小鱼爱吃鱼) died in a collision after riding in the wrong lane. She was instantly killed on the spot. Xiaoyu had gained attention for her risky driving behavior, often wearing short skirts, tight leggings, or other revealing outfits instead of proper motorcycle gear.
“Xiaoyu Loves Eating Fish,” images via Tencent News
In 2023, two young girls—one 16 and the other 21—tragically lost their lives after their motorcycle crashed into a pillar. They were speeding and, apart from wearing helmets, were dressed in skirts and stockings with no additional protective gear. Both died instantly. The 16-year-old, known as An’an (安安), was a social media influencer. Her followers had previously warned her about her reckless behavior. She rode a motorcycle without a license.
An’an’s social media profile.
Within one year alone, from October 2022 to September 2023, at least seven motorcycle influencers made headlines in China after losing their lives in traffic accidents. Some bloggers blame the intense competition for online attention for these accidents, as influencers pull dangerous stunts and push the boundaries to gain more likes and followers.
Posting a video of a woman posing for a video while riding a motorcycle, the popular Weibo content creator HuangXiPao (@黄西炮) wrote: “So many female motorcycle influencers have died, yet it doesn’t stop others from still posing on the road for photos! Is this trend really that profitable?”
One commenter expresses frustration over how news about motorcycle influencers consistently reaches the top trending lists, while other serious incidents, such as the big stabbing incident that happened in Shanghai this week, seem to be kept off the hot lists. “Every time a female motorcycle influencer dies, it makes the trending lists. Meanwhile, three people are dead and 18 injured in Shanghai! Yet you’ve completely suppressed the search term (…) What is this about?!”
News about the motorcycle incident is also a reason for official channels to remind netizens about road safety. The official China Police account shared photos of the incident, stating: “Raise safety awareness and take responsibility for your life.”
By Manya Koetse
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China Memes & Viral
Why the “人人人人景点人人人人” Hashtag is Trending Again on Chinese Social Media
China’s Golden Week, from October 1 to October 7, is one of the busiest times of the year for travel and sightseeing, with crowds surging across popular destinations.
China is celebrating its National Day Holiday this week. This week-long holiday, also known as the Golden Week, is a popular time for trips, travel, and sightseeing.
On Chinese social media, it has become somewhat of a tradition to post about just how busy it is at China’s various sightseeing spots. This is often done using hashtags like “人人人人[place]人人人人” or “人人人人[me]人人人人.”
The character 人 (rén) means person or human; “人人” (rénrén) means “everyone,” and the more “人人人” (rén rén rén) are used, the more it playfully emphasizes the crowds of people.
On October 2, the hashtag “人人人人景点人人人人” was top trending, rén rén rén rén jǐngdiǎn rén rén rén rén, which basically means “people, people, people everywhere at the tourist spots, and more people.”
One such crowded place is Suzhou (苏州), where its ancient Shantang Street in the heart of the old town is packed with tourists this week ( #人人人人人苏州人人人人人#).
Crowds in Suzhou, photos posted on Weibo by @数码王小机
Other places like Chongqing, Xi’an, and Hangzhou also saw vast crowds during the various celebratory events and performances organized in these cities.
People also posted photos of the situation in places like the Guangzhou Zoo on October 2nd, or at the Beijing Great Wall, or at the Longmen Grottoes in Luoyang.
Crowds in Luoyang, images by @李旭的散装生物学
Besides the Great Wall in Beijing, other places in the Chinese capital are also seeing large crowds this week, such as Tiananmen, Summer Palace, Forbidden City, Lama Temple, and Nanluoguxiang.
Beijing crowds via @秒观视频
Beijing crowds via @秒观视频
Although China’s domestic spots are drawing massive crowds, China Daily reports that international travel has become more popular again during this year’s week-long National Day holiday, with bookings for international flights doubling compared to the same period last year.
According to the travel platform Qunar, there is increasing demand for new and more niche destinations, including countries in Africa. However, the most popular international destinations remain closer to home, such as Hong Kong, Bangkok, Kuala Lumpur, Seoul, and Osaka.
Also read: China’s National Holiday Crowds: Even the Desert’s Camels Are Stuck in Traffic
By Manya Koetse
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Featured image on top: Guangzhou South Station during National Holiday, by @爱打板的乐哥
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LGBTspreadAIDS
June 24, 2018 at 7:38 am
she is probably LGBT and drinks from the furry cup.
Xavier
August 4, 2018 at 2:40 am
@LGBTspreadAIDS
How in the world does not wanting to get married have anything to do with LGBT? I frankly don’t care about getting married and I’m totally straight. So what’s your point?